Phyllis Abbie Kirkpatrick

Phyllis Abbie (Furbeck) Kirkpatrick 

July 8, 1938 - October 18, 2024

Phyllis was born on July 8, 1938, to George Nelson and Irma (Cousins) Furbeck, in Mexico City, Mexico. Phyllis’s fond memories of growing up in Mexico City include Sunday dinners after church with her family, friends at the American School, and earthquakes during which the city seemed to rock on the lake. She loved the sight of the mountains all around the city. During 2nd grade, at the height of WWII, Phyllis and her older sister, Irma Ann, went with their mother to live with their grandmother in New Orleans, LA, while her father served as a US Army doctor in Tunisia and Okinawa. Phyllis’s family returned to Mexico City following the war, where they remained until Phyllis was 13, when they moved to the US, living in Louisiana, North Carolina, and Texas, while Phyllis’s father worked as a public health doctor. Following her graduation from high school in 1956, Phyllis and her parents moved to San Antonio, TX. Phyllis graduated from Trinity University in San Antonio in 1960 with a BA in Sociology. 

In 1963, Phyllis met the love of her life, Ronald Kirkpatick, on the ride back from a single’s luncheon while working as a secretary at Southwest Research Institute in San Antonio. Phyllis and Ron fell in love and were wed on May 16th, 1964. The young couple subsequently moved to Austin, TX, where Phyllis earned her "PHT" (putting hubby through) working as a secretary in the University of Texas Astronomy Department, while Ron completed his PhD. 

Phyllis and Ron moved to Greenbelt, Maryland, near NASA's Goddard Space Flight Center. While in Maryland, the couple welcomed their first child, Abbie Elizabeth, in 1969. The young family then moved to College Station, TX. Phyllis made several lifelong friends in College Station, and the family grew, welcoming Andrew Walter in 1971.

In 1972, the family came for a six-week stay in beautiful Los Alamos, NM, and then returned permanently in 1973, when Ron accepted a staff position at the then Los Alamos Scientific Laboratory. Phyllis loved the sight of the mountains all around Los Alamos, and said they reminded her of the mountains that had surrounded her during her childhood in Mexico City. With the birth of Ann Marie in 1975, the family was complete. 

Phyllis and Ron settled in White Rock, and Phyllis devoted herself to her family. Phyllis’s kids’ childhood memories include her cute drawings of horses and shmoos and people napping under cacti, birthday parties with coded menus, hours happily spent painting the fences and sidewalks with water, cuddling with her in bed, giggling at her silly sense of humor, licking batter from spatulas and bowls, and being tucked into bed with bedtime stories. Phyllis gave her kids a strong foundation of encouragement, acceptance, and love. 

Due to her personal struggles with bipolar disorder and to the relief she found from nutritional therapy, Phyllis organized the Los Alamos Nutrition Interest Group in 1978. This group presented many interesting talks and discussions on a variety of health issues over the next few years. Phyllis enlisted her children’s help, and they have happy memories of coloring in the rainbows on each and every copy of the group newsletters and meeting posters. Phyllis continued advocating for the importance of nutrition in the management of mental health long after the Nutrition Interest Group disbanded, and through this work was able to help many people over the years. 

Through her quick wit, charm, kindness, and welcoming manner, Phyllis developed many deep and cherished friendships. She kept up with friends near and far through phone conversations and correspondence. She could often be found laughing in the kitchen while talking on the phone with friends, and she took daily walks with friends and neighbors around the “loop”. She was also an active member of the church prayer chain. 

As her kids began entering college, Phyllis returned to work, first as a temporary secretary and then joining the Lab’s N Division, where she remained until she retired. Phyllis and Ron liked to joke that Phyllis was a "key person" at Los Alamos National Lab, because Phyllis’s office kept track of all of N Division’s keys. 

Phyllis shared her love of nature with her family. She was always quick to exclaim over the beauty that she noticed all around her. She enjoyed picnics with her family in Bandelier and camping trips with her family at Las Conchas campground in the Jemez Mountains. On hikes at Tsankawi, Phyllis would sometimes send the kids and Ron on around the trail while she took some time to herself in the sunshine as a “lizard on a rock”. She accompanied the family on many winter cross-country ski trips in the Jemez; while her kids slogged up hills and whizzed and tumbled down hills, she would take her own more relaxing route, rapturously enjoying the snowy winter wonderland. In later years, as mobility became difficult, Phyllis enjoyed sitting at the dining room table, watching the hummingbirds visit the feeder just outside the window. Her joy at the sight of the hummingbirds was infectious, and she would cry out excitedly, “Look, look, look!” 

Phyllis had a great love of music. She used the money from her very first salary at her very first job to purchase a record, and over the years her record collection grew. Her kids remember standing next to her in church and hearing her harmonize on the hymns. Ron remembers scenic drives through the Jemez Mountains to the soundtrack of Mantovani playing on an 8 track cassette tape. In the tough days when she was struggling with normal pressure hydrocephalus, Phyllis was able to sing even after her ability to speak was gone, and after she began to recover from her shunt surgery in 2020, she started humming songs before she started speaking again, and many songs came back to her faster than speech. 

Prior to developing complications from normal pressure hydrocephalus, Phyllis enjoyed traveling. She loved taking trips to Texas and Colorado to spend time with her grandchildren and Ann. Among her favorite international trips was a trip to Norway to see Abbie and then on to England to watch Ron run in a track meet. Phyllis and Ron also traveled together to Spain where Phyllis was able to use her childhood Spanish. And Phyllis once bravely spent an entire month alone in Taiwan caring for Abbie; there Phyllis navigated the shops and took care of all their daily needs even though she spoke no Chinese at all! 

In her later years, Phyllis was beset by a prolonged series of illnesses. The family thanks all those who helped care for her, including her professional caregivers, therapists, and physicians. Their tireless guidance and care made it possible for Phyllis to stay at home even after she became bed bound in 2020. During her final four years, listening to music, singing, reading, favorite shows like Carol Burnett and Highway to Heaven, and just the sight and nearness of Ron brought Phyllis joy. 

During her final tough ten months, Ron, Abbie, and Andy cared for Phyllis around the clock at home. 

Phyllis passed away early in the morning of October 18th, 2024, at the age of 86, at home and with her devoted husband, Ron, by her side. 

Phyllis was preceded in death by her parents and her sister, Irma Boltman. She is survived by her husband, Ron, and her three children, Abbie, Andrew, and Ann, as well as her two beloved grandchildren. 

Phyllis will be remembered for her glorious smile, her sense of humor, her love of a good nap and a good laugh and a good cry, and for her endless and loving support and encouragement. 

Funeral services will be held at White Rock United Methodist Church at 580 Meadow Lane, at noon on Saturday, November 16th, 2024. Following the church service, a graveside service will be held at Guaje Pines, after which the party will return to the White Rock United Methodist Church around 2:30pm for a reception and celebration of Phyllis’s life. 

Donations in memory of Phyllis can be made to the Hydrocephalus Association: https://www.hydroassoc.org/ , or to a charity of your choice. 

To leave messages of condolence for the family or memories of Phyllis, please visit her memorial page at www.riverafamilyfuneralhome.com